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On The Bricks

January 3, 2017

          Recently there is a person that has really gotten on my nerves. Keeping snide comments to myself has become a chore, but I’ve managed so far. When I ponder what makes me dislike being in conversation with him for any length of time, my answer is that he is so very selfish. He takes all conversation topics back to something about him.

          While thinking on this, my mind traveled to the fact that often we are irritated by the very things we do / are. That’s usually not a comfortable contemplation and typically we aren’t aware of how true the statement tends to run. If this is the case, then I needed to look at how selfish I am.

          So, in order to be honest in looking at how selfish I am, I looked on the internet to see what characteristics selfish people display. Now I’ll share.

          Selfish folks generally have unbalanced relationships (work and personal). They tend to expect and demand more from others than what they are willing to give. Usually they are very shocked when this is pointed out to them.

          Are you only excited to do the things you enjoy? Do you get bored and restless and try to squirm out of thing that your partner / friends enjoy? If you can’t share your partner’s happiness from the things they enjoy, it’s a good sign that you’re selfish.

          Selfishness is a sign of self – gratification. You are so self – centered and believe your needs are more important than everyone else’s needs.

          The selfish person is often nagged because they are insensitive to the needs of their partner. It may show you’re not listening to your partner.

          Selfish people are often control freaks. They are often perfectionists and are convinced they are the only capable people in a company or family.

          Selfish individuals are unwilling to share, give, or brainstorm with others. They generally choose to work alone.

          Selfish is all about the ego. This person knows what he wants and is willing to go after it. When he sees an obstacle, he probably becomes defiant and refuses to collaborate. Their refusal to give an inch is a symptom of classic selfishness. Why should he go out of his way to find what other people are feeling, their ideas, hopes, and ambitions?

          Self – centered people believe what they do in life is more meaningful and worthwhile than what others do. You may have a better job or get a bigger paycheck, but that doesn’t mean you should get preferential treatment. If you truly believe you’re more important and your opinions matter more, you’re being conceited and selfish.

          Selfish means you want it your way. You always like doing something your way or going to places you like even if your partner / friends want to do something different. If your partner / friends coax you to do something else or go to a different place, you sulk or pout the whole while.

          Selfish people don’t trust their partners easily. They are cautious about trusting them completely because they sincerely believe they’re the only one who can ever achieve happiness for themselves. They always look out for themselves first before looking out for others.

          Selfish people often find it hard to apologize over things that really matter and yet get angry or upset if others don’t apologize to them.

          Self – centered individuals put high expectations on others and when you fail to meet them, judgement follows. To help you meet their expectations, most people with big egos establish rules for you to follow.

          “How was your day?” is something a selfish person seldom asks. One therapist said that it is hard to feel like you really matter to someone who always dominates the conversation. It is as if you’re only there to stroke his ego.

          The selfish conversationalist is more concerned with defending their position than acknowledging your point of view.

          One article stated that it is hard for a selfish person to see their selfish side. All of us can be selfish at times and that’s not a bad thing. But if your selfish streak is less of an occasional occurrence and more of a behavioral trait, that’s something you need to pay attention to.

          Some of those really did hit home with me. How did you do? Seems we all have a ways to work on ourselves, doesn’t it?

          See you on the bricks!