July 19, 2019
Summer is the time for class reunions. And some reunions have some real surprises for us.
You get me?
Harvey Deutschendorf wrote, “For much of the 20th century, we assumed the person who was the smartest, or had the highest IQ, would be the most likely to succeed. That’s what everyone thought when I went to school. However, after attending our high school reunions, many of us realized this wasn’t always the case.
“Of course, having a high IQ – receiving a high score on an intelligence test – is still a good thing. But social scientists now confirm that strong social skills are a key element to success and that humans are born with the potential for EI (emotional intelligence). This inborn capacity may be damaged or highly developed, depending on a person’s life circumstances and experiences. However, the wonderful thing about EI is that with work and awareness, we can rebuild or enhance EI regardless of our backgrounds.
“In 1990, two American professors, Peter Salovey and John Mayer, coined the term “emotional intelligence” to identify a type of self – awareness they believed had greater influence on human behavior and life outcomes than pure brain power.
“In 1995, a science journalist Daniel Goleman expanded on the concept in his seminal work, Emotional Intelligence: Why it Can Matter More than IQ. The book was a fixture on bestseller lists for nearly two years and was translated into 40 languages. Among other insights, Goleman notes three levels of EI: (1) recognizing the emotions of others; (2) feeling what others feel; and (3) understanding others’ motivations and emotions so well that a respectful, trusting connection develops.
“… Goleman’s book says in essence ‘your intelligence can come to naught when emotions hold sway.’
“… Harvard recently released results from a 75 – year study, looking for the single most important and reliable predictor of happiness. The answer? Our connections with others ….”
Deutschendorf proceeds to explain in this article in the July 2019 Toastmaster magazine, the importance for EI of Listening; be fully present, put yourself in their shoes, let the speaker know you understood, practice active listening, and curate curiosity.
Lofty personal goals in that short paragraph, but ones that make sense.
You get me?
One thing that is true, in my opinion, is that I can always improve myself. Lots of room for that! And life is more interesting when we have challenges.
Hope your days are filled with happiness and fun challenges to meet.
See you on the bricks.